7w2d: Back to normal (and acu story)

I am out of it. The girls on the board sometimes call it "pregnancy brain". How could I even make this mistake (I am talking about my last post)? Last time at 7w1d we heard a heart beat of 111bpm and saw a baby measuring 6w3d! We were very happy (for a few days, at least)! It's two weeks later that we found out the baby didn't grow past 6w5d.

Yesterday I was worried because my tiredness went away and I wasn't sleepy. I stayed up till 2 am on Sunday night (well, I did lay down for about an hour and a half that afternoon) and wasn't tired at my "other work" during the day yesterday. But today, let me tell you. I already snoozed for 20 minutes and I am yawning like there is no tomorrow. I really wish I could lay down and fall asleep!

Ups! My boss just came in and gave me a small task to do; this woke me up. :)

Also happy to announce that my boobs are still hurting and the fact that they are SUPER sensitive is probably an accomplishment of a new, more comfortable bra purchased on Sunday. Also, I am feeling pretty sick now even though I am not hungry. It used to be that I had a heartburn when not hungry, now it is nausea all the time. And as far as the sudden release of constipation (which happened last night and totally convinced me that my baby didn't survive), I was off my regular herbal supplement from my acu doctor (I ran out of them on Saturday morning). I bet my digestive system was affected by it at least a little bit.

One more thing. I always forget to write about my acupuncture, I don't think I ever did, actually. So here is the story.

I decided to try acupuncture after reading so much about it on the board and in fertility related books. I have never liked regular doctors, because they always tried to give me things to remove the effects of whatever was wrong with my body. Oh, you have a headache? Why don't you take a painkiller! Oh, your foot hurts? It's inflamed, stay off it for a while and if it doesn't help, you can get a cortisone shot which will take care of the inflammation. But there has never been a question WHY there is headache or WHY there is inflammation. I always knew that pain was my body's way of telling me that something is wrong and that my body needs me to do something or it needs me to stop doing something. I wanted my doctor to have the same approach. Wanted him/her to help me figure out what may be the problem, instead of trying to quiet down my body when it's asking for help. Same applied to fertility. I don't want to do IVF. I want to change whatever needs to be changed so that my body can produce good and healthy eggs and sustain good and healthy environment for a growing baby. I really hope I can succeed.

I did my research and found several acupuncture places nearby that either specialized in or at least treated infertility. There were also a few that helped with fertility. Those are the ones I decided to call. Again, I didn't need another person to tell me that I am infertile because my eggs are old and it's only a slim chance that I may have a baby in the future. I needed positive thinking.

I called three places. The first lady was a one-person practice a few blocks from where we live. However, even though it would be very convenient, when I spoke with her on the phone, we didn't really "clicked". Called another lady. We "clicked" a bit better and I actually made an appointment. We spoke on the phone for good 20 minutes; I told her briefly my history, and she told me what her approach was. She suggested (as she suggests all women she treats for fertility issues) to stop TTC during the first three months of the treatment. Her explanation was that it takes about 100 days for an egg to mature, which is the time she needs to help it mature properly. So why conceive with bad eggs before! And here I got her, again, negative energy, assumption that my eggs are no good. I was fighting with my thoughts for a few days and finally decided to find another person. I guess it didn't help that this woman was taking her patients in a massage salon.

My next call was to a clinic that specializes in acupuncture, chiropractic, and physical therapy. I read the bio of the doctors who specialize on fertility and made a call. That was Friday. I had my first treatment on Monday.

The main difference between my Acu doctor and the western medicine doctors I've meet before (I went through six only since we started TTC) that a good chunk of the visit is spent on talking to the patient. He writes down pretty much everything I tell him and next time I am there, he asks follow up questions about those things. Did it change? If so, for better or for worse? When and on what occasion did I notice the change? Can this change be related to anything else? Etc. He also tells me what he things is in issue and actually asks if I think he is right! He said to me once that he can only read my pulse and my tong (that's what they observe every visit) but majority of information he expects to get from me, simply telling him how and what I feel. I love it that he actually encourages me to listen to my body!

I should probably finish for today. I will write about what happens every visit some other time. For now, my boobs are sore like crazy, even the new bra isn't helping any more. I am so happy! :)